Yes, peeps, Lady Jewels has been hard at work on her fourth, read, FOURTH novel.
Well, not hard at work actually, more like only just started and wrote the first five, read, FIVE chapters last sunday.
At least it’s a start, considering I’m over a year late, (I wrote the last three 2 years apart), but alas, now it is 3 years apart and will not be until next year that it is published.
Yes, you read correctly, I am giving myself until May of next year to get it published because for a start, it’s only five chapters in and I can only work on it on weekends as my other life keeps me busy during the week.
I’m surprised I haven’t collapsed from exhaustion really, with everything I do.
So I have until next May to write it, edit it, have it assessed, re-edit it, THEN get it ready for Smashwords, Createspace and Kindle.
I think it will be enough time to have a publish dues date of May 1st, what do you think?
I haven’t posted since last week, and since then I’ve been trying to think of things to write about.
Sure, I could write about getting fat from all the chocolate I ate over Easter and the next fat burning thing I’m going to try to get rid of the kilos.
And sure, I could write about the fat bastards on The Biggest Loser but I did that last year.
Sure, I could write about writing a new book except I’m currently not.
And sure, I could write about what’s going on in the world right now but it’s so fucking boring I’m not going to bother.
Sure, I could write about my life and the shit going on in it, but I’ve been there and done that.
And sure, I could write about whining about finding something to write…….
What the hell do you write about when you have nothing to write about?
“I mean” – why start a sentence with this when it means nothing and you have not said anything to then try and explain because you think what you just said was confusing and that the person you were telling it to might not understand it.
“Like” – stop using it, Facebook is not real life!
“You know” – I actually don’t, unless you tell me. The Big Brother house used it a lot last year and it annoyed the hell out of me.
“Honestly” – I hate when people start a sentence with this word because seriously, I want you to lie to me and why do you need to say it in the first place unless you think we all think you’re a liar anyway!
“To tell you the truth” – again, I’m asking you to lie to me for fuck’s sake, get real.
“Look” – At what? What do you want me to look at? I don’t see the point of this word at the beginning of a sentence when there is nothing to look at unless you are actually pointing to something.
“Totes” – A tote is a bag to carry your stuff around in, nothing else.
“Amazeballs” – I get that it’s essentially amazing but fucking hell!
I know that some of the above words are used by myself (look and you know) and I am clearly aware of when I say it and am trying to break the habit. When people use honestly and I’ll tell you the truth at the beginning of a sentence they are so hiding something.
You only use shit like that when you are lying and want people to think you’re not, or you know you’re a liar and want people to think you’re not, or, you just don’t want people to think you’re a liar in general, either way, it don’t work!
As for taking two words and making one, it’s as bad as all the baby names people give their kids.
I am so sick and tired of the way people speak. There is no need to start a sentence with look, or you know. We actually don’t you bloody dickheads!
uploading your pdf to CreateSpace or Smashwords, or contacting someone to do a
cover for you.
another name for it, that’s what I’m going with.
VEGAS edited and ready for self-publishing by July 1st 2012.
over and over and over it until I thought it was good. Then I sent it off for
an assessment. Then I edited again and again and again until I thought it was
ready to set into a CS template. I did that, and emailed people about covers
which took awhile to get going as people have their own deadlines and computer
issues, and all within my credit card monthly budget.
far ahead on the editing that I didn’t think I needed to rush into the cover or
June and I still need to put it together in CS and then wait for a copy to ship
to me. Behind in time? Absolutely. I should have had my cover done and a copy
on its way to me before the end of May. But there are always setbacks.
up and ship a proof but I wondered about my lagging behind and what it had to
over the line?
Things don’t get done unless you push/force/make yourself. And that’s what I
need to do. Am I scared? I don’t know but there is always this little nagging
doubt and “oh no let’s not rush this” that seems to pop up in the
last lap around.
only one to get this stage fright in the last leg of producing and publishing a
book. Needing that little nudge over the line to get it done and out there.
There must be others who experience the same fears or grand delusions and have
to push themselves into doing it.
In the weeks leading up to the release of my books I suppose I’d better start some writing posts.
Not so much about how, when where, although I suppose those questions will come up, but more along the lines of how far I’ve progressed to how far I’ve come.
When I wrote my first novel, THE ROAD TO VEGAS, back in July/August of 2006, I knew one day I’d be famous for it.
But no publisher wanted it.
I can see why.
While I believe the story is still good, it definitely needs an overhaul and will be the third book I release, sometime next year.
In Feb of 2008 I wrote my second, HOW I WON LOTTO, MOVED TO L.A. & MARRIED A REALLY HUGE TV STAR!
It took about three weeks of handwritten labour and then another three weeks of typing it all up. After two years of submitting a publisher wanted it, but also wanted to take another two years to publish it. After many a night of crying over either saying no, or paying an exorbitant amount of money to get it released this year, I said no.
Then last year came LIFE AND DEATH ADVENTURES IN LONDON, my third book which will be released at the same time as LOTTO.
I sent it on the usual round of agents and publishers and did think of digital, as Cyn-B-Demented suggested. But at the time, I wanted to hold an actual book in my hands, and see it on bookstore shelves.
Then one day, a few weeks later, I came across CreateSpace and realised I could hold my book in my hand, and not long after the realisation hit me, “Why am I waiting for a publisher to tell me I’m good enough?”
So I decided to do it all myself and have set the plan in motion. Especially since bookshops are a dying breed (my closest one has shut down) and the “BIG PUBLISHERS” don’t seem to want any new fiction from unknown authors anymore. But that’s a different story.
Back on the first of May my list was – get my books edited, get them formatted and get them uploaded.
Well, I’ve had one copy edited and the second has been sent off. I’ve decided to do the formatting myself, so that’s in the next few weeks. I’ve had covers done for some time but have tweaked them to the specifications of the places I’ll be selling. I’ve downloaded and printed all necessary info from all three places about formatting and selling. I’ve also set up Facebook pages for the books and they will go live when the books are published.
So, while I have done so much, there’s still so much to do.
Yesterday was the day for one last proof read of LOTTO, and then sending separate copies into three separate folders, I’m going to attempt the formatting by following the instructions.
I think it went well. The instructions were somewhat easy but I wasn’t able to do a table of contents and it took me well into the night.
In future writing posts, I’ll detail everything, but not down to the last crossed t and dotted i as that will be too boring, but I’ll definitely thank the other writers for their help and give links to their websites for future writers.
If you have any questions about my writing or anything to do with my books, let me know and I might start a FAQ page if anyone thinks that’s interesting enough.